A few weeks ago, I was having a rough day. You know those days where you have the BEST of plans, and nothing seems to go like you thought it would? It was one of those days.
I had a long list of things that I was excited to get done, and it just wasn’t happening. One of the kids had stayed home from school sick, and needed some attention. One of the teenagers was home at lunch time, and was in the rare mood to chat. Some things came up with my church calling that needed my attention. The hours were ticking by, and nothing on my list was getting crossed off.
Now, since I know that I get to choose my thoughts and feelings, I kept trying to tell myself that this was not a problem! These were all good things that were demanding my attention. A to-do list is never more important than people. Those things on my list will still be there tomorrow. I kept telling myself that there was no need to be irritated or frustrated.
It wasn’t working. There was still an unidentified negative emotion swirling around inside of me that I couldn’t seem to shake. So I stopped what I was doing and took a minute to closely examine what I was feeling. It was disappointment. I recognized it now. I was excited about my plan for the day, and then it didn’t happen.
I decided to allow my disappointment, and to just feel it. I cried for a minute. I let my shoulders sag and my body feel heavy. And guess what? It actually felt kind of… good! Who knew feeling disappointment could feel good??
I decided that sometimes negative emotions are like a good sneeze. Trying to resist it feels pretty terrible. And when you’re trying not to sneeze, it’s hard to really focus on anything else! But when the sneeze finally comes, it is such a relief! It actually feels good!
Just sitting there feeling my disappointment that day was such a relief! It lasted maybe 5 minutes, and then it just… went away. I was able to get back to the people that needed me, and give them my very best. I believed the thought that a to-do list is never more important than people, and was happy to serve them. And strangely, when I think about the next time I’m going to feel disappointment, it doesn’t sound negative at all to me!
We know there needs to be opposition in all things. That’s the plan that we all “signed up” for. Negative emotions will come. That’s part of being alive. But as we learn to allow them, instead of react to them or run from them, they cease to have power over us.
Christi
